How the “Colleague Zone” took priority over friendship at work | EUROtoday

On Apr 22, 2025

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VITTOIRE spent a decade leaping from one nation to a different. Short missions, suitcases at all times prepared. English for conferences, German for the market, Italian for evenings on the embassy. But over the contracts, the necessity for stability has ended up imposing itself. She selected to return to Paris to hitch a consulting agency.

Meanwhile, his associates who stayed on the spot had youngsters, discovered their cheese maker, put in their habits. Today, even when the sidewalks are acquainted to him, town escapes him just a little. And within the workplace, the ambiance does not likely assist to weave new hyperlinks. “Here, everyone swallows a sandwich in front of their screen,” she says. There is Justine, with whom we snicker just a little. But from there to supply him to go for a drink? I really feel that it is nonetheless too early. So within the night, earlier than returning, I sit alone on the terrace, with a e book and a glass of wine. »»

Together, however increasingly alone

The loneliness described by Victoire just isn’t distinctive. In France, hyperlinks are distended, relations are scarce. According to the most recent research of the Fondation de France, 12 % of French individuals over 15 reside in a scenario of relational isolation right now. Concretely, it means going by way of entire days with out a voice to pronounce your first identify, with out anybody with whom to share a espresso, for a second. Lives that happen subsequent to others, with out ever actually mingling. We meet, we typically salute, however we do not linger. Most of the exchanges comes right down to the helpful: a “thank you” to the grocery store, a machinal “hello” on the bakery. That’s nearly every little thing.

Read too “Going out with a colleague?” Hell ”: why love at work is endangeredWhat modifications is that this relational vacuum now extends to work – this place the place we cross, on common, 1,600 hours per 12 months. A number of years in the past, the Wall Street Journalindicated that the workplace arrived simply after the neighborhood among the many most conducive locations to make associates or fall in love. The screens monopolize consideration, the conferences are linked tirelessly. The collective is erased in silence. A phrase from the Internet ended up appointing this discreet vagueness, this proximity with out momentum that settles between colleagues: the Colleaguegue Zone.

The time period, popularized on the networks, discovered its place within the Urban Dictionary in 2015. A variation of the Friend Zonetransposed to the workplace. Here no flirt, however the mild wait {that a} hyperlink is shaped, {that a} complicity invents – after which nothing. An absence that doesn’t damage, however leaves a hole. Well -kept courtesy, a distance wrapped within the consolation of makes use of. So we keep there, on this lukewarm on a regular basis space, manufactured from prudent smiles, chosen phrases, and climate bulletins exchanged in a low voice.

Discreet put on of unrelated labor

For the previous few weeks, Pierre has been searching just a little away from bed. It just isn’t fatigue, fairly a floating, a momentum that doesn’t come. Accountant, he lately acquired into his account to realize freedom. He realizes right now that he has primarily misplaced the others. “It’s hard to talk about your work to anyone. No coffee at the end of the day, no birthday to celebrate, not even a pot when there is good news, ”he slips. He nonetheless exchanges along with his clients, after all. But the phrases are exact, the exchanges framed. None of those phrases thrown on the bend of a hall, these unimportant confidences which, casually, make the day lighter. “Today, I understand how a lot my colleagues made it maintain: discuss, moan, snicker just a little between two recordsdata … It made the times bearable. Sometimes even nice. He marks a break. “Without that, everything becomes more mechanical. »»

Read too “I need to see people”: why the Z generation abandons teleworkWhether freelance or an employee, working alone is no longer exceptional. Peter knew that he was likely to feel a little isolated. What he had not planned is how these colleagues would end up missing. However, the effects of lack of social ties to work are well known. And widely documented. The first sign is often well-being that flanks. In 2022, an OpinionWay for Malt study recalled that 81 % of employees consider relationships between colleagues as essential to their balance. “The link to others is the first lever of well-being at work. It is not an additional supplement, it is the basis, explains Christophe Nguyen, work psychologist and president of the human imprint. When the atmosphere is good, that you can laugh at noon, ask for a hand without fear, everything becomes more bearable. We collect better. On the other hand, when this link disappears, we isolate ourselves. We no longer take a break. And everything becomes mechanical. »»

The motivation follows the same path. “At the beginning, working alone can give the impression that you are more efficient, because you only depend on yourself,” continues the specialist in the prevention of psychosocial risks. But very quickly, something is missing. We need feedback, recognition, to be able to share what we did. Without that, we run out faster. We lose the taste. And then one day, we wonder for whom, and what we work for. An IFOP survey for Securex, carried out the same year, supports this observation: 74 % of employees say they feel more effective when the relationships are good.

And then, without noise, it is the commitment that collapses. Less visible than the rest, but just as deep. According to INSEE, well surrounded employees are 1.7 times more invested. Because we do not get involved for a series of tasks, but for the people with whom they are accomplished. Because you feel, even briefly, belong to something larger than yourself.

7 out of 10 executives observe a rise in individualism at work

Nine months ago, Audrey left Paris for Toulouse. She had just landed in a company in the aeronautical sector. New departure, new city, and the desire – discreet, but present – to meet new people. “When I see my parents’ friends, most have known each other at work,” she slips. But here too, the exchanges remain polite and without relief. “My colleagues always refuse to get out, to talk about their private life. At noon, we stay on the organization of the next vacation, plumbing problems, work, it’s a little sad. Fortunately, some promo friends’ settled around. She hesitates a little and ends up adding: “I do not know if it is linked to this sector of activity, or if it is a wider phenomenon. But I wonder. What still differentiates us from the machines is what we feel, what we share. And there, sometimes, I have the impression that it is disappearing. »»

Read too “I can no longer, I leave”: is the contagion of “resignation by revenge” on the march? Contrary to what the young woman thinks, the withdrawal she observes is not limited to her business, or even to her sector. According to the 14ᵉ Barometer “Psychological health of French employees”, produced by human imprint and Opinionway, 60 % of employees – and up to 7 out of 10 executives – say they perceive a rise in individualism at work. Fewer shared breaks, fewer spontaneous impulses, more functional silences. “We often accuse the telework of being at the origin of this phenomenon,” regrets Christophe Nguyen. As if the distance was enough to explain everything. He stops for a moment, chooses his words. “But the cause is deeper. For me, it is mainly due to a managerial system based on permanent competition. »»

Between optimization, performance and mobility pressure

Individual objectives, dashboards, performance indicators. Everyone progresses in their corridor, concentrated on what to deliver. Counted, evaluated, compared. “We want to measure everything, even what is not measured. The finesse of an exchange, the intuition of a collective, the quality of cooperation. We try to get everything in boxes. By quantifying, we end up impoverishing what connects. And the economic situation only strengthens this logic. In an uncertain economic climate, companies track optimization: reducing costs, mastering margins, doing more with less. “The teams adjust. We keep the strongest profiles, those who hold. And too bad for others, ”he provides.

Another actuality, simply as structuring: on this whirlwind of optimization and administration by figures, corporations are struggling to acknowledge the worth of their inside forces. To hope for just a little extra recognition or a easy wage adjustment, many workers don’t have any selection however to depart. Where the earlier generations constructed their journey throughout the identical construction, climbing the ladder through the years, the OECD stresses that right now, we alter jobs on common each 5 years. A quicker tempo, which weakens the ties, makes the collectives extra porous, and leaves little time to friendship. Not that of networks or compelled hyperlinks, however that which is born within the margins, on the bend of a hall or a hole throughout the day, and which ends, with out noise, by giving work just a little of its warmth.

Read too “Help, my superior steals my concepts for me!” »: Pillage, this ordinary office sport
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Answer

So sure, the Colleaguegue Zone could seem anecdotal. One extra phrase within the identify of labor, saved between Quiet quitting And Soft Skills. And but. She says, in hole, what we don’t at all times wish to see: ties that wrestle to determine ourselves, a type of well mannered withdrawal that settles. And what the staff nonetheless got here to hunt on the workplace – a collective, a recognition, a type of presence – fades, absorbed by the routine of the goals, the margins to defend, the strain of the deliverable.

For Christophe Nguyen, it’s the symptom of a short-termist system, which damages psychological well being as a lot as social bond, which dries out the need and delights dedication. By dint of monitoring efficiency, we empty the work of what made him livable. There stays just one contract, dry and with out detour: time in opposition to a wage. The relaxation fades. The need to share. The pleasure of being collectively. The feeling, even fleeting, to belong to one thing. And, on the finish of the chain, immobile silhouettes behind their screens – nearly indistinguishable from the machines they flip.

https://www.lepoint.fr/economie/c-est-un-peu-triste-comment-la-colleague-zone-a-pris-le-pas-sur-l-amitie-au-travail-22-04-2025-2587873_28.php