Should you put in parental controls in your baby's smartphone? | EUROtoday
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LLouise's daughter acquired her first cellphone in center faculty. “A Nokia 3310, the little phone with which you can only write and call,” says this mom of two youngsters. But in a short time, in fourth grade, we needed to change to a smartphone – “more practical for group work and his classmates used WhatsApp to communicate”. His son acquired a smartphone from the fifth grade, “useful for taking photos”.
Louise has not arrange parental controls on each units. No want, as a result of his kids “are not at all glued to their cell phones”. And don't wish to, both. “I don’t want my son and my daughter to feel cheated,” explains the 43-year-old journalist. And I believe that may be the tip of the belief I can have in them, of the belief now we have in one another. » The two youngsters haven’t any different functions than WhatsApp, Spotify for music and Duolingo for international languages. She specifies: “For the moment, they don’t want it, don’t feel the need for it. »
“Establish screen time”
Many dad and mom might not acknowledge themselves on this testimony. Most of them describe the very robust temptation, even dependancy, which might come up from the phone. Starting with Julien, 40 years outdated. This “divorced dad” explains that he gave his daughter a smartphone on the age of seven and a half. “I live separately from my children: they are in Bordeaux and I am in the capital,” he says. So, it was a solution to have contact with my daughter. »
But what occurs subsequent doesn’t go as deliberate. “My daughter wasn’t calling me. She was more looking at TikTok and “Insta”,” he sighs. Very shortly, Julien arrange parental controls. With Google Family Link, he can “monitor the apps she goes on and also control what she installs”. And “above all, establish screen time”.
Her daughter, now aged 12, has the fitting to “forty-five minutes a day during the week and an hour and a half on weekends”. And that’s sufficient to already “get addicted”. “Sometimes she calls me to say ‘add me five minutes, ten minutes’, and that annoys me,” he says. Over time, I turn into increasingly more extreme. » On his daughter's smartphone: WhatsApp, YouTube, and nothing else. The teenager is just not entitled to different social networks. “It’s especially the image of women that is reflected on Instagram and TikTok that shocks me,” he confides. I don't need her to match herself to the movies she would possibly discover. » If her daughter “sometimes protests”, she will be unable to open an account on these platforms earlier than “she turns 16”.
“Trust does not preclude control”
In French legislation, the numerical majority is about at 15 years. This is the age from which a teen can create an account on social networks with out the consent of their authorized guardians. This measure was put in place on July 7, 2023 to fight on-line harassment and hatred.
15 years can also be the “recommended age” to offer your baby a smartphone, based on the DD Lise Barthelemy. “Even if the later the better,” insists the kid psychiatrist, belonging to the collective towards overexposure to screens (CoSE). It have to be remembered that this can be a device designed for an grownup and never for a kid. » As quickly because the smartphone is launched, she advises to “set up parental controls and talk with your child”, as a result of “trust does not prevent control”.
Accompanying your baby with a smartphone whereas repeatedly discussing its use can also be the answer chosen by Jonas, 52 years outdated. He thus lists “the brief on the dangers of personal images on social networks, the ban on TikTok, and the authorization of Instagram at 13 years old, provided that the account is private, that [les parents] can follow him and his followers on Instagram are people she knows. If he admits to regularly taking stock of the time spent – “and not on the sites consulted”, he desires to make clear – Jonas signifies that he and his daughter are “in a climate of trust”. And smiles: “It’s time to gradually let go. »
To search or not to search your child's phone
“One hour per day in middle school and two hours in high school”, that is the optimum length prompt by the DD Barthelemy. And an important factor for her is to “save moments”. “You really don't need any entertainment in the morning, or in the evening before bed to preserve the child's sleep,” she provides. These play instances have to be reserved for Saturday or Sunday afternoon, for instance. »
Indeed, the smartphone will be thought-about “today’s console”. This is the case of Jean-François, a Parisian govt, whose three sons, aged 8, 10 and 12, have a phone. “Sometimes the smartphone can be a way to keep them busy when I have to work or when I'm busy,” he admits. With parental controls, nonetheless, I can instantly lock their display screen in the event that they play for too lengthy. »
The father in his forties says he’s “rather confident with his children”, whereas remaining “vigilant” and “very worried about the algorithms that suggest content”. And he assures that he won’t hesitate to “search the phone” if unsure. “I've already opened the phone and looked at my son's WhatsApp conversations,” he admits. And then I discovered myself overwhelmed as a result of I didn't perceive what he and his pals have been saying. »
To search or to not search, that’s the query. “If parents want to observe what their teenager is doing on their smartphone, they must always ask for their consent. It is about support and education on screen, more than control,” underlines the DD Barthelemy. Because, by this display screen, “a relationship of trust” is established between the 2 events. And added: “If parents are monitoring without their child’s consent, then they might as well not give a phone at all. »
But even the most fervent defenders of a “screen-free policy” have needed to resort to purchasing their youngsters a cellphone. Like Géraldine, in a short time “caught up with school”, by “digital work environments” (ENT) and “WhatsApp discussion groups at college”. She additionally has parental controls in place. Because “it’s a real drug,” explains this forty-year-old mom from the Paris area. Even if mine usually are not too “addicted” and nonetheless have affordable use.” The one who had, till now, “no television, no computer, just a tablet for [son] personal use” confides “blaming the school”. “Because they force us, as parents, to introduce a screen very early,” she says. While my sons didn’t ask me for it and maybe by no means would have requested me. »
https://www.lepoint.fr/societe/faut-il-installer-un-controle-parental-sur-le-smartphone-de-son-enfant-16-04-2024-2557887_23.php